Saturday, August 18, 2012

Today is my bitch

I've had a really up and down week. I've worked straight through, and have been having the most messed up sleeps. Every night for the past week I have been having the most vivid dreams! And they all involve people that I see on a daily, to weekly basis. It's fucking freaky.

ANYWAYS! I'm at work, and yesterday was a god damn doozy! I started working at the Liquor store (which has the same owners as the spa) on thursday, so it was a 12 hour day. Yesterday I worked at the spa (covering for the other receptionist for the weekend) and then at 9 when we were done, i went to the liqour store until 1230 to learn how to close. and HOLY BALLS i was totally wiped out. I didnt get to sleep until like 3 or 4, and i was up at seven to get ready in time for work. Yesterday the computer at the desk wasnt working, so i had to go in and out of the god damnoffice to ring everyone thorugh, and make appointments. But still had to do all the tendering and cash at the front. IT WAS A GONG SHOW. I had to fix it today, so needless to say I WASNT LOOKING FORWARD TO MY MORNING! i just had that feeling that it's not going to be an easy fix, and that my day was going to spiral out of control... AND IT DIDNT!! so awesome! (but, when you start your day at starbucks, with Brandie as your Barista, it's hard not to be a happy camper :) I fixed the computer with little to no effort, and then gave a client a battery jump, then Beth wanted to be at the desk, so i got to relax for a bit before getting to work! (as I blog...) It's sunny, I'm all caffienated, and actually got to eat breakfast this morning! It's a beautiful daaaayyy!
We got no troubles
Life is the bubbles
Under the sea
Under the sea
Since life is sweet here
We got the beat here
Naturally
Even the sturgeon an' the ray
They get the urge 'n' start to play
We got the spirit
You got to hear it
Under the sea
DOOP DEE, DOOP DEE , DEE DOOP DEE DOOP!

^ That's how I feel right now. Won't lie.

      SO! the Vancouver aquarium. I fucking love it. There's love, and then there is how I feel about the aquarium. It's an entirely different level of love. I don't know if I've mentioned it before. But i kinda like sea animals. Nothing really crazy. Just a strong, undying love for pretty much everything that lives in the water. Especially if it looks fucked up and/or could be seriously harmful. Why i'm like this, I have no fricken clue. I just know it's always been this way. When I was really little, my favourite book at my grandma's place was the "sea life" learning book. It was one of those old kid's learning encyclopaedias that MOST children dont actually like, because it's just facts, no story or characters. and not like, huge type and simple facts. but an honest to god encyclopaedia. loved that shit. ate it up. My favourite section in that book was the deep sea fish one. Used to scare the fuck out of me, and I was always super disappointed that there was only like two pages on them. (apparently when i was little, I liked fucked up shit as much as I do now. I love shit that scares me. Seriously. I think I need counselling..) It's why I did biology, it's why I love the Little Mermaid, It's why I got an octopus and a shark tattooed on myself. It's probably partially why I'm such a spaz. I just fucking love sea creatures. I get so excited, that it worries me. And I feel bad for anyone who is with me when I am meeting new creatures. Like Owen's koi pond. I thought i was going to die. I got to pet them, and they nibbled my fingers!
      OH MAH GAD I'M GETTING EXCITED JUST THINKING ABOUT IT! Oh lordy. I don't usually own many fish. Like maybe a fighting fish at a time. I'm more so into free wild SWIMMING PLAYING OCEAN DWELLERS! OH MAH GAD! I need to go to the aquarium. right. fucking. now.

       TOMORROW I GET TO GO TO THE OCEAN. AND PLAY WITH THE CREATURES. I WILL MAKE A FRIEND. AND WE WILL BE BEST FRIENDS. I dont give a shit what he is. a star fish. a crab. a little itty bitty fish. a barnacle. some fucking sand. I dont care. I will befriend it. and we will have a connection FOREVER. shit. I hope the ladies that are going with me know what the fuck they're getting into...
    I swear to god I had a point to this blog.
    uhhmm....
    not coming to me...
    JEE SUS! Why can't i remember? I got too excited and distracted myself.

Leatherback Turtles are crazy endangered guys. It's not cool. These guys are super awesome! They're HUGE! like seriously! they can be up to about 6 feet long, and weigh a ton! they have a ridged back and tear shaped body, you can pick them out of a crowd for sure. Sadly there's not much of a crowd left to pick them out of anymore... you can read about them and the efforts that the aquarium has for them here:
there's some info on other turtles there too! TURTLES! YAY! but it's super sad that they are becoming so scarce :( the world can be pretty shitty like that.
sad face :(
Ever heard of a Snot Otter? (goes by Hellbender as well) They're pretty crazy. They're in the "near threatened" category. These ugly little fuckers are disappearing. Honestly, they ooze toxic slime and they dont look anything like a fucking otter. well. maybe if it was covered in snot... but I have never seen an otter covered in boogers, so I dont really have anything to base that assumption off of. They're big ass salamanders. Like they average 2 feet in length. holy. balls. Anyways, these guys are pretty cool, and I would like to meet one. Hopefully they won't all die. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hellbender there's some info if you wanna read more. I dont see why you would want to if you aren't me. but whatever.

I would love to have an animal discovery show on fucking tv. THAT WOULD BE SO AWESOME. but i wouldnt go to africa. fucking africa gets all the animal attention. it's bull shit.

fucking africa.


Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Just another day in the life

Hello again my dear, precious web based fan club. How are you? I bet you're super flippen excited that I'm blogging again. I bet you are. Pretty much pee your pants, run around in circles, jump on the furniture excited! I know I am.
And I'm at work.
Visualize that.
There's urine EVERYWHERE. It's not exactly pretty.
This week was super exciting for me. I worked (wooooo!) Then on Thursday night, at like 2 am (technically friday morning i guess) My friend Nicole and I drove my roommates to Tswwassen so they could go to the island and get a car. WE DIDNT GET BACK TO CHILLIWACK UNTIL 830 AM! yeah! Then I promptly had a shower, and then GOT CALLED IN TO WORK FOR 10:00. Nicole worked at 1 as well. I was a wee bit on the delerious side, as being awake for 26 hours before starting work has the tendancy to do to an individual! I then had an appointment with the wonderful Nicole (bless her patient, angry Ginger heart.... HAHAHA THAT WAS A PARADOX IF I EVER SAW ONE)and then went home. Changed into my yoga pants, and huge dragon shirt. then promptly got locked out of my house. with only my spare key for my car (not a key for my wheel lock bar) and my cell phone. i wandered the streets of chilliwack crying and texting. i looked like a crack head. I fit right in. My friend Ross saved me, and i spent a good 6 hours with him. Then went home, no one was home still, so i lay down in my car, LIKE A FUCKING HOBO for a while until they got home. My day ended up being 44 hours long.
fuck.
that.
shit.
My weekend was awesome though! I saw my lovely cousin Ali on saturday, and their new puppy! Then I started house sitting for an animal that i dont really have many strong positive feelings for. My boyfriend and I made dinner, and watched star trek.
SUNDAY WAS FUCKING AWESOME. Nicole and I had super-awesome-adventure time. we went to the othello tunnels and basically rubbed it into the worlds faces that we are not only A) really fucking white but B) very touristy and kinda retarded. It's an exclusive club. very limited membership. AFTERWARDS I learned how to play Pathfinder, and have chosen what character I want for the next Dungeouns and Dragons meet. AND I AM FUCKING PUMPED. BITCHES WONT KNOW WHAT HIT THEM. THIS HALF ELF DRUID IS GOING TO OWN YOUR SHIT! I just wish I could have an octopus companion :( But i'm super stoked. looks like Sundays are going to be the best day OF THE WHOLE FUCKING WEEK.

What's new bambinos? I think this post is boring. I say that a lot dont I? I think I have some serious Blog insecurities. I wish all ya'll could talk back to me. When I ask for your input I never hear anything back. I feel like a really clingly girlfriend. The internet is a TERRIBLE boyfriend... Seriously I spend SO much time on our relationship, and all you do? post porn and cat pictures. Not what I was going for internet. not what I wanted.

So i ordered some feathers and Rhinestones from Hong Kong the other day. And they're fricken gorgeous. They will be used for nail art. Seriously these things are incredible. let me find the shop that I bought them from.... heres the link for the Rhinestones http://www.etsy.com/shop/qrhinestones?ref=pr_shop_more

http://www.etsy.com/shop/PudgyFeathers       That's another shop that I will be purchasing from soon. Her stuff is amazing. But I will hold off for now, because I only ordered the Hong Kong ones now because chances are I wont get them until October anyways.
If you Have any requests or ideas for designs, let me know. Like I said, I will be doing them in fall.
SORRY FOR SPAMMING THIS BLOG! I will have one specifically for Nails when I'm going. I'm just way too bloody excited right now.
Fuck.
More urine.
Jesus. I should have never stopped using those day time adult diapers.
I have to get this under control.

READY FOR FRIEND OF THE WEEK?!?!?!?!!?
My friend this week is super awesome. He's a crazy chill dude, who is my nerd match. DRUMROLL PLEASE!
OWEN!
He's, Like I said, super awesome cool time! I met him through work because him and his wonderful wife (Danielle) were my ultimate favourite regulars at starbucks, and turns out He totally knows my older brother and worked with him. He's my old man best friend. Like for serious, this dude is old. Like world war 2 old. It's kinda weird, I have to help him count his change at the store, read the ingrediants on his food, count his pills out for him, and make sure everywhere we go is wheel chair accessable. I had to get my first aid just so i could hang out with him, incase he poops himself, or has a seizure. We spend a lot of our time playing with action figures, or driving out to langely to go look at action figures. Or watch Star Trek. Or talk about Star Trek, Star Wars, comic books, pop culture references, and share war stories. He is the cheese to my nachos, the caramel to my mars, the princess to my Leia, the Captain Kirk to my Spock.
If you have EVER met him, you know what I'm talking about.

Time for my fact!
subligaculum is the underwear that Romans would use. they could be in the form of shorts or loin cloths, and both men and women wore them. sounds delicious. especially since they probably were all sweaty and sludgy by the end of a long day of gladiator-ing.

Anywhoooo, I should skedadle.. go do some work.. sweep the floors, wash the windows...
Make the fire, fix the breakfast
Wash the dishes, do the mopping
And the sweeping and the dusting
They always keep her hopping
She goes around in circles
Till she's very, very dizzy
Still they holler
Keep a-busy Cinderelly!
...*cough*...

...
I love you all! Have a fantastically life changing week, and a perfect evening.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

Ten things I realize at 3 am while lying in bed with the lights on and star trek playing

What do I realize right now? It's three am and I am noticing some incredible things. Not necessarily Nobel winning epiphanies. Just simple things that I feel I should share with the world.
Number ten:
             My favourite colour pretty much has to be purple. It's just the best.

Number nine:
             The lady who made my bagel at timmies about an hour and a half ago was harsh tweaking,           and even though every time I have ever dealt with her, she's tripping major balls, she makes my bagel just perfect!

Number eighth:
             I love Star Trek as well as Star Wars, and I don't believe that I am "cheating" on one franchise over another. It's a strong, passionate, true love for them both.

Number seven:
            People need to stop being such serious dicks to other people because they have different interests. Suck it the fuck up, maybe try something new maybe? Branch out! A little meth never hurt NO ONE!

Number six:
            I love swears. Cursing is the best.
             Shit. Fuck. Ball sack titty hammer.

Number five:
            My boyfriend might be a lizard. He's always really hot. And also has a high temperature on a regular basis.

Number four:
             Lemonaid is fucking ACE! I could drink that shit forever.

Number three:
             No one needs a multimillion dollar house. That's just wasted space. I don't need my bathroom to be 700 square feet. It'll feel like someone's in the room with me, watching me tinkle. No one needs that. They might want that, but they don't need it.

Number two:
              Sometimes when I'm super tired I shoot my a straight up into the  air and just keep it there for like half an hour. It's comfortable.

Number one:
          Bitches ain't shit.





There you have it. Don't ever tell me I don't do anything for you.



Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Creepy Crawlies and other junk

Hello fools!
 It is Tuesday, august seventh. holy. balls. That is ridiculous. There's lots of new shit going on in my life, what's new? I just re read my old post and LAAUUUGGHHHHEEDD!!! Pretty much ALL my plans fell through! WHAT A SHOCK! coming from the most flakey person in blog history! My plans just dont get a break!!!
 To start, school in kelowna fell through, I got accepted, but they informed me i had to do an extra semester of courses to qualify for the program, and i had to start in the may semester, which started two weeks after i received the notice. so that didnt work because A) i'm too poor and B) fuck THAT.
THEN, i had a bunch of money saved up to buy a camera, so i could start my own little business and BAM my fucking car's timing belt blew and turned my motor into change! SO the four grand i had away for the camera had to buy a new car. because honestly, it would be the same amount to fix the engine in a 1990 HONDA CRX, and it would be to buy a new car. so I ended up getting a 2003 Toyota Echo for a little more than i had saved which is FUCKING AWESOME. but stupid, because I am not taking photos :(
I quit at starbucks because HOLY SHIT that place went to HELL! Plus I was going squirrley, loved working at starbucks, the Safeway was the biggest problem. BUT im not getting into that!
SO now I'm working four days a week at the spa, doing reception duties, and i honestly love it! I'm making NO money, but I'm the happiest I've ever been at a job :) I moved in with my boyfriend and his two roommates for the time being (cheaper than rent at mom's place, plus I get to be with Jeff) and i hoppeeewe get to move after i'm done school, in like december. nothing  personal against my roommates, but I really don't want to have roomies while I'm living with my boyfriend. I like my own space, and I'm a privacy buff. PLUS I'M SURE YOU REMEMBER WHAT A FUCKING STICK IN THE MUD I AM! Don't really do the whole socializing thing when I dont have to. Which is difficult to avoid in a house full of people.
DISCLAIMER! nothing against my roommates, I just dont like talking to anyone when I'm at home after work. Dealing with the public is a lot of work, really drains the essence of  your soul, if you know what I mean.
With that! I start school in September! I will be taking the Nail Tech course through en Vogue and doing nails! I will work out of the spa to start, and will see where things go. DONT YOU WORRY, you will hear all about it. I will be handing out cards like theyre candy, and spamming my blog/facebook page. THIS IS GOING TO HAPPEN! I have already paid my deposit, and I am too poor to not do it now!
AND I've lost 20 lbs! only 45 more to go ! WOOOOO!
so... What to say. I've had a lot of time to do more reading and drawing. and LOOK WHAT I FOUND! its a fish called a northern stargazer, and this fucker looks like a demon face lurking beneath the ocean floors waiting TO SUCK YOUR SOUL OUT OF THE BOTTOM OF YOUR FOOT. it will probably eat you, and your babies, and your baby's babies. (souls that is) and leave you a soul-less, hollow shell of a person until the day you die. Dragging out menial tasks, not knowing something amazing is within your reach. So.. basically go get a minimum wage job working with customers and you'll understand what I mean. ANYWAYS this little fucker burrows into the mud in like four fucking seconds and then just sits there waiting for someone to come by so he can FUCK THEM UP.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-vjNB8g0-A&feature=player_detailpage#t=15s
fucking insane.
if you couldnt tell.. I love animals.. especially sea creatures. fuckin love them.
On this computer I can't post photos.. Which blows. (i'm at work)
This blog seems pretty dry.. Just me rambling on about my life. as usual i guess...
With my nails, I will be doing some pretty crazy shit. I plan on doing specials and shout outs and shit, I will be able to travel with my equipment and will more than likely be doing a lot of appointments out of my house.  I have quite a few art designs I really want to try, however I dont know many girls who would go for them. SO if you know anyone who would be interested in star trek, star wars, or general nerdy nails, send them my way. My course should be done end of October, and I'm super excited.

What can I add to this? I should bring back Feature friend of the week! (because i totally blog weekly) hmmm... the friend shall be...
Brandie!  I seriously LOVE this girl! She is one of the SWEETEST, CUTEST, and NICEST girls I know! We haven't seen each other much in the last few months, me not working at starbucks and all. We used to live with each other, like.. two years ago. holy crap its been a long time. but! I still love her! She's a great lady! (and her boyfriend is prety bad ass as well) She makes me happy when my days are sad, and she is just a cheerful little light to my days! so! Shout out to Brandie! If you're lucky enough to know her, you know what I mean!

fact of the day:
Octopusses (or octopodes) collect crustacean shells and other objects to decorate their lairs, create fortresses or little "gardens" around their homes, like for real! (Thank you Ringo, for making such a cute song)
 INSERT PHOTO OF A SUPER COOL OCTOPUS THAT I HAVE DRAWN ALL OVER, HERE!

I don't think I'm missing anything at this point. Other than a big thank you to everyone for reading this (or not reading it, whatever floats your boat really) and maybe drawing some form of amusement out of my nonsense rambles and foul language!
You are all tasty little morsels of exquisite beauty, have a  fabulous day!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

And the rain hides everyone, phone call and it all comes undone

Hello everyone! I am Blogging from my desk at work, because I am a bad ass and am just asking for trouble ;)

Anyway! HOW'S EVERYONE'S DAY GOING?!?!
....*crickets*...
oh.. right.. I forgot all of my cyber friends left me... well this just got pathetic REAL fast...
anywhoo.. my day is alright. Working my double shift day. OH RIGHT! just because you all care, I got a second job! AGAIN! i know! you're all shocked that i went and did that, because it's not like i'm a workaholic or anything.. nooooo... i would much rather spend my early twenties behind a desk, or espresso machine helping everyone else have a wonderful day/week/early twenties than have a good time myself. they all say "WELL CASSY, I BET YOU'RE ROLLING IN THE DOUGH!!" well.. i'm not.
surprise hey? i have no dough to roll in, just less debt. not by a hell of a lot, but a little less. mostly saving up for a car, and moving in August, so being responsible and WHAT NOT.
I always feel bad using the computer here, but am often reassured that i'm okay to do what i'm doing. SO DEAL WITH IT.

I had a whole lot to rant about, but now i can't remember what about.

oh! my fearless leader Jeff is going to be leaving his position at starbucks come the end of March! I am actually devistated... I knew i would be.. but seriously I'm upset! who else am i going to be turbo nerdy with?! or tell stupid jokes to... or make dirty comments with. or.. anything really? like dont get me wrong, I love all the girls I work with at starbucks (one of them being my best friend) but I CANT LOSE JEFF! i will be the most manly one that works there now. That just isn't cool with me. and the nerdiest. I will by far out nerd everyone. and now im the least inclined to party.. which officially makes me the Nerdy, Manly party pooper of the group... jesus. and the cynic! oh lord... good thing i only have like 5 months left.

I am slowly starting my own itty-bitty photography company, should be up and running in about 3-4 weeks! right now i am building my portfolio so i can charge money ;), i'll be getting my new camera in a couple weeks as well, so if anyone wants to take me up on some free portraits or photos of any sort, really, email me at
cassondrascamera@gmail.com I SHOULD have my website up soon as well... however I am quite non-internet savvy. When i am up and running and have all my portfolio pictures, i will offer my services at quite low rates just so i can build some clients, or whatevs. I will also have business cards coming my way, and will be throwing them at errrrrbody! SO BE READY TO BE SPAMMED BY MY ITTY-BITTY PHOTOG-BIDNESS!
Cassondra's Camera if you want cool photos, dont mess with anyone else ;)
AND LIKE IT ON FACEBOOK! it will be up in a couple days... i'll post it.

things i like:

Hello Kitty
New clothing
Zebra Print
my friend Kim
my new job at The Gallery Spa http://www.thegalleryspa.com/ (check it out)

I am also going to start making a super mini web comic, because my fearless leader said i should try out. so we will see if i have any time, as of right now i am working 2 jobs with an average of about 56 hr/week, then respite care for my brother, babysitting for the neighbors, doing chemistry, trying to get some photo shoots in there, and of course birthdays and such! GOLLY WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF!
not to mention i NEVER EVER EVER see my lovely boyfriend :(

random fact for FEBRUARY 29/2012
most female marsupials have 2 vaginas, and because of this, most male marsupials have pronged penises!
...woah...




i found this and i want it. i found the pattern.. soooo unless someone wants to buy it for me... ima make it. dont know when, but i will.

anywhooo i'm going to go now, if anyone has a TOPIC THEY WANT ME TO DISCUSS ON THIS BLOG TOMORROW NIGHT, LEAVE A COMMENT HERE OR ON MY FACEBOOK PAGE!!

have a wonderful evening, and a delicious tomorrow my scrumptious little tidbits!
<3

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Shitty Starbucks music. Because I would rather look like I enjoy it than not fit in.

So right now I am blogging from my phone while sitting in a Starbucks in Vancouver. I decided it doesn't get much more hipster than this, plus when I read I get really into it and keep on squeaking when exciting things happen and apparently that makes people uncomfortable.
When I'm in vancouver I feel like a total country bumpkin. I don't look cool, I don't sound cool, I'm not trendy, I'm terrible with Large groups of people and I often find myself getting lost in situations where an adult really should not lose their way. I get sore ankles when I walk and hate the general public. I smile at strangers and apparently in Vancouver that is reserved for crazy people and children. Since I am neither (or so I like to tell myself) I look a liiiiitttlle out of place and am often given disgusted looks. Which to be honest is fine with me, because I will never have to spend any extended amount of time with any of these people. That and I doubt their going to go home to their little studio apartment and tell their boyfriend and cat the riveting story of how some hick girl smile at them in the street. Their organic lattes and recycled furniture would inspire greater conversation than I am capable of providing.
A girl walked in with a skirt that I THINK is supposed to be considered vintage, however looks like an old dirty handkerchief that she has wrapped around her waist. She also has a pink corset on over top of her jacket and hr pantyhose has HUGE runs down the front, sides and back of her legs. I can't tell if she destroyed them while trying to put them on this morning, or if it's a fashion statement. Either way it looks atrocious. I really try not to judge people on what they wear, because I definitely have my "WHAT THE FUCK?!" Fashion moments. But this... This is bad. Like as If she decided to dress herself but only had one outfit left because she sold the rest of her clothes to pay for her crystal meth, and honestly, why would a hooker need to have nice pantyhose? She's just taking it off anyways. In her defense, she did have a really cute hairband. And I think if she didnt have that corset on her jacket was pretty nice.

Anyways! The reason why I am In Vancouver is because my friend Diane is Going to hair school and she needed a model. So I'm taking a risk for her :P
My phone is starting to piss me off, so I am going to stop blogging now.


Random fact for feb.20-something, 2012:
7/10 vancouver citizens think your pink Mohawk looks stupid, mostly becaus you are a 55 year old woman.

I love you all.. My precious little angel Bambinos.

Friday, January 27, 2012

There's something different 'bout the way she offends me..

Hello internets!
I believe it's been a year since I have blogged. Because i'm a bad ass. I'm just going to call it a vacation. a blog-cation. It works for me.
Would you all like to know whats happened? OF COURSE YOU DO!
uhm... my then boyfriend and i broke up in april (i think) when i worked at ardenes as well as starbucks. Then I decided that I am happy single and decided to make some real career choices and live on my own, no roommates, nothing. I was going to make new friends and lose a bunch of weight! life was going to be AWESOME. 
And then I re-met jeff. and all of that went down the drain. I did make some real career choices and lived on my own kind of... i made new friends and gained weight. 
I'm going to save a whole bunch of sappy shit for you guys because you dont need to hear all that. I moved and he shortly moved with me. then i was diagnosed with cancer. then i had surgery and then i had to recover.i got a new job, it didnt work out, i had no money and had to move home. and then had my 21st birthday this month.
and thats where i am now.
i HAVE however started losing weight, and am only working one job right now which is VERY confusing for my poor little self.... i'm barely managing. 
I'm drving my friends PT cruiser for winter and will be trading it for my honda again soon (you know.. rex!!) because the pt cruiser hates me a bit i think...
this is a really lame post. isnt it?

I found what programs I want to do for school, and will be going to the Okanagan College in Kelowna for September. for either Therapy Assistant prgram, or Associate of Arts Degree. WE will see which ones work out. So this means I have 6 months of Fraser Valley Bliss. I am very excited to start school again, and to move back in with my amazing man, and to see a new town. 

OH I GOT A KITTEN! SHE'S THE BEST! Jeff named her Phantasmal Bear. that being said... i've learned how to play Magic.. and I enjoy it. I have taken the turn into full nerd and my transformation will be complete soon. (HAH! like as if I wasnt already a total nerd to begin with...)
I have also slipped into the realm of make up. I have a whole bunch of new colours and shadows and brushes and have been going crazy. I am planning on buying a new webcam and then doing makeup tutorials on my you tube channel. those who care, I will post links all over the place. 

This blog is terribly not interesting. I will be more interesting in the future I promise.
ready for a random fact?


An elephant is as long as a blue whale's tongue.

WOAH! thats kinda gross. thats a big fucking tongue. 

I will end your misery now. I'll be back...

and in greater numbers.